Abandonment and the Inner Child

We all suffer from abandonment of one kind or another. Our first abandonment is a spiritual one, for deep within we remember we come from an abode of light. There is sadness in all of us, whereby we finally remember the celestial world from which we came. That is why we seek to reconnect with that light through religious and spiritual practices.

Then there is the abandonment we suffer when we move out of our teens into the grown-up world of responsibility. Protection offered by our caregivers in youth is lost and suddenly we are in a dog eat dog world, trying to make sense of it all.

Then we go through various abandonments in our relationships as we try out various combinations and we discover that the idea of romantic love is a concoction — an idealism that grew out of the Middle Ages. The real thing is often not built to last. The words “and they lived happily ever after” is just a cute way of ending fairy stories. In real life, living happily ever after takes a lot of effort, communication, and compromise.

The material world of competition and performance sets us up for further knocks.. If we falter, or if we are not up to form minute-by-minute, we are soon rejected and ditched. If we don't make it in a world that worships glamour and materialism, our self-image may suffer a setback.

Then, many of us had to deal with abandonment in childhood. Our fathers and mothers left and went elsewhere, Or they were physically present but they were engaged in the helter-skelter of modern living. We were virtually ignored as we grew up, left to our own devices. Maybe the presence of it all drove our caregivers to drink and drugs or other dysfunctions.

Abandonment is common. We each face it as a part of our lessons in life. We have to transcend the sense of loss and helplessness and become freestanding individuals, in control of our lives. It's easier said than done. But none of the lessons of the earth plane are beyond us. If the lessons were impossible, I doubt, from a spiritual perspective, that any of us would have come here knowing that we were bound to fail.

The other abandonment we have to deal with is when we experience society in general, and when the State in particular has abandoned us. As we become more isolated, people become less helpful and nastier, especially as conditions get

tougher. Meanwhile, the State has changed from being a benign protector of its people to an aggressive predator, one that seeks to consume people's energy ( security) to sustain itself.

Another abandonment we are forced to look at is the abandonment of self. In a lifestyle of excessive activity and dysfunction, we often abandon the inner child, who is then left in the terror of its lonely existence, unable to do anything about its pain.

First, we have to realise that abandonment and the loneliness it brings, is common to all of us. Our world suffers from mass abandonment. It's part of our evolution at this time.

Second we have to want to transcend that abandonment and reclaim the inner child, by nurturing it and acting as it's lost parent. It has to know that we will protect and look after it. By taking care of the inner child we become self sufficient. To rely on others who are in the rat race and or the State apparatus, is to enroll in the University of Hard Knocks.

Once we realise materialism is an illusion, we see that we can have serenity and self-worth without great wealth, and prestige. We can then retreat within, away from the mire of the outside world, and so the healing process begins. As a part of that healing we have to link with others, forming tribal connections with loving, helpful people who understand there is another way. it's important that each of us has a support system around us. In actively joining the Love Vibe and others of like mind, we grant ourselves meaning. It is how we step away from the ego’s isolationism to a more collective global belonging.

Finally we have to return to the source. So via meditation, quiet time, ritual, and prayer, we walk slowly back to the spiritual home from whence we came. In that silence we pick up the inner child; reassuring it, embracing it, while telling it we love it and promising never to leave it behind unattended and alone.

Taking 3 years off from being on the road was my way of claiming back that which I had lost. It meant a lot to me, more than words can say. If I drop dead tomorrow I would do so, at one and at peace with my God and my inner child. By transcending abandonment, I completed a journey, one of many I suppose, but an important one.

Stuart Wilde.